Well, we got unkind people too, but I meant more like people having good intentions but still thinking about their friends before the person who just got here, you know? That can be dangerous, too.
And, uh, I've been here for eight and a half years.
[And yes, she knows how that sounds.]
I was an inmate for a little bit, but mostly I've been a warden.
[She pauses, looking intrigued by that] ...I guess it depends on who's doing the killing... [After all, she'd be overjoyed if a certain someone killed her
But anyway, back to that question--] I don't know. I'm not very sorry for what I did. I think what--what they did to me was worse. That they brought it on themselves. So... They're the ones that should be here...Not me.
I'm sorry. I feel that way about some people from my world, too. Or-- I kind of do, but I kind of hate the idea of them being here because I hate the idea of them graduating and feeling like they're getting told by the Admiral that they're okay now.
[She's quiet for a moment, considering it all] Even if I 'graduate'...I was already dead long before I was released and sent here. It's not like I have a life to go back to.
[Her brow furrows and she shakes her head] No. I was supposed to live in the village and die for it. My sister and I tried to escape, once, but... It didn't matter. I didn't even think where we'd go.
If I could be with my sister, it didn't matter where we were. [She didn't particularly allow herself to dream of more, not seeing the point when she knew she'd never see it]
It was really scary when I first got here. [She smile a little though]
But I like it now. It makes me feel so...small, or like I could just fall into the stars and swim around them or something. I like going up there now, I wouldn't mind meeting you there.
[There's a smile in Tiffany's voice, and she opens her mouth to say something - but decides, in the end, to save it for when they're face to face.]
Okay. See you there.
[And then she clicks off.
She doesn't, technically, recognize Sae. But she does recognize the look of someone she doesn't recognize who's looking for someone she, in turn, also doesn't recognize - and so when she thinks she spots her, she takes a chance and approaches.]
It makes you feel small in a good way.
[She says, completing the unfinished thought.]
Not like you're getting ground down or brushed off, but like-- like you and your problems aren't everything that's out there, and like you're a part of something big.
[She'd been waiting only a little bit before Tiffany arrived, her eyes fixed on the stars up above. When Tiffany speaks and continues the conversation they'd just been having, it startles her, though it allows her to easily identify her.
She eyes Tiffany curiously; Sae herself is dressed in her normal white kimono with its red obi, and there's a red, rope-like marking around her throat. But Tiffany's response makes her smile a little again]
Mm. It feels like there's so much more out there, waiting to be seen... [She looks back out at the stars] I've never been this close before. It's hard to believe sometimes.
[And Tiffany, in jeans and a t-shirt, is definitely underdressed in comparison. It doesn't seem to bother her, though: she joins Sae easily, leaning her elbows on the railing.]
[Sae eyes her curiously then, as if trying to decide how much she might really understand. But she seems to accept it enough, perking up some when she has the chance to talk about her sister,/small>]
Yae is great! She's kind and wise, she's confident and good at making decisions. She's definitely the leader and the strong one. [She smiles a bit, though her expression is wistful]
We're identical, but I think our personalities are really different... She's more outgoing and friendly. I was always the shy one...
It always feels like y'all want me to leave you alone, and I think it's real important to not be pushy and to respect people's wishes, so--
[So she often ends up disengaging, and sometimes it turns out that that's not what they want or need at all.]
Is this the first time you've been without Yae? Like, are y'all together at home a lot?
[Sae, she thinks, looks young - possibly young enough to still be living under her parents' roof. And as far as first homes away from homes go, she can't think of any place more jarring than the Barge. Talk about being thrown into the deep end of the pool.]
Oh… [She frowns a little, brow furrowed, and shakes her head] No, I don’t want that. I just… Don’t know how to talk to people much.
[She considers a moment before continuing] Where I’m from, girls don’t leave the home until they’re married. And in my village… in my village, twins are considered sacred.
No one talks to us. They’re too pious, or… too afraid. So it was always just me and Yae.
Our mother… Even our mother couldn’t stand that she’d had twins. As soon as she realized, she killed herself. So it was just us and our father. He was the head of the village and the ceremony master, so we had a lot to live up to. Or… Yae did. No one had any expectations for me. I was the younger twin, so all that was expected of me was to die for the village.
You don’t waste too many resources on a cow you raise to slaughter. [There’s no emotion behind this— just a statement of fact.]
[Sae shakes her head, sighing softly. Her expression is wistful]
No… my sister and I tried to escape, but… it didn’t work. Or rather, we fell and got separated. The village found me and they never found Yae.
They sacrificed me by myself. But they did it wrong; I came back. And I wiped the village off the map, and everyone in it.
[Her fingers curl into her kimono and she takes a deep breath, slowly uncurling them again.] The place was cursed and I was in the dark for a long time. Then someone came and broke the curse. And I came here.
[Tiffany doesn't want to be repetitive by saying it out loud again, but she repeats it in her head: Jeeeeeeeeeesus. Her fingers clench on the railing, but - overkill or not, heinousness of killing those in the village who were innocents or not - her anger isn't directed at Sae.]
I'm sorry about what they did to you. And I'm sorry-- I'm sorry you lost Yae.
[She lets out a shaky breath.]
Has anybody ever told you that you didn't deserve all the shit they put you through?
[It's not often she hears people express that-- maybe two or three times now, and every time she doesn't know what to do or say in response. She supposes they're right, even if Sae twists it in her own head. She didn't deserve to die like that. It should've been Yae killing her. That would've been the only proper way.
She rubs her arms a little and looks at Tiffany quietly, as if trying to decide what to say.]
I don't know. I mean... I'm glad that people care. It's... different, and a little strange. But it's nice. I don't think I deserved to go like that either, even if...I knew I would have to, some time.
I didn't mind doing the ritual. I wanted to help my village, but... Not like that. [She sighs deeply and looks away at the stars again] I don't know. I've never known anything different, so being here has been...odd.
I felt the same way when I got here. Kind of. I ain't gonna pretend I was raised to be killed in a ritual, but... I weren't used to being valued, is what I mean.
People are...very nice here. And... They really seem to care about me and like me. At least, the ones I have met have been. Sometimes, I wish I could show the people of the village how much I could be liked.
[Tiffany isn't much of a tea-drinker herself, but so many people here are that she's gotten used to having it on hand, and she likes the ritual of it.]
magic medicine would work the best i think but you don't have to do that if you don't want to
[and then she switches to audio. She sounds...alright, if a bit wispy and she's interrupted occasionally by giggles that seem to bubble up]
I will reach out. [She sounds like she's struggling to keep her own composure though]
Things have gone... [She trails off, as if she doesn't know how to best describe it, but then it stretches on as if Sae's simply forgotten she's speaking in the first place]
Yeah. Shit's gone ass o'er tea kettle. Likely ta right itself in 'bout a week, but in the meantime, yer gonna get ta be what ya are when ya ain't here, power-wise. Ya'll have somethin' on ya ta serve as yer Warden item so ya can get inta all the exclusive places--lounge, enclosure, Warden conference room, et cetera.
[He pauses long enough to wet his lip.]
Means the Wardens ended up like how we are normal, an' so they just lost a lotta shit that's important to 'em. Those that got proper pairs just...kinda just swap places. But Ulla ain't got one, so she's fucked in that department. He said ya could speak on her behalf though. Hence me touchin' base.
Just call Ulla up an' ask what she wants ya ta ask fer. Then there's a place ta call up the Adm'ral an' say 'I want ya ta give Ulla this'. He'll say yes or no, but that's the process fer doin' it. Ulla can help ya with more details if ya want, given her bein' a Warden who was an Inmate prior. She's been on both sides'a the fence.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
shinkunochou) wrote2022-07-26 06:37 pm
audio
audio
Hello? Yes, I'm new. People have been very nice to me... I've met a few helpful, kind people here.
audio
I'm Tiffany. People were very nice to me when I was new, too.
no subject
Pleased to meet you, Ms. Tiffany. My name is Sae. How long have you been here...?
no subject
And, uh, I've been here for eight and a half years.
[And yes, she knows how that sounds.]
I was an inmate for a little bit, but mostly I've been a warden.
audio
Video
[At least it’s not a relative stranger like before, which does make her feel a little better. She looks down and then away]
I’m sorry in advance.
Video
My last inmate killed me once, and I love her more than anybody. Just so you know.
no subject
But anyway, back to that question--] I don't know. I'm not very sorry for what I did. I think what--what they did to me was worse. That they brought it on themselves. So... They're the ones that should be here...Not me.
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It all feels very... What's the point?
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[Her brow furrows and she shakes her head] No. I was supposed to live in the village and die for it. My sister and I tried to escape, once, but... It didn't matter. I didn't even think where we'd go.
If I could be with my sister, it didn't matter where we were. [She didn't particularly allow herself to dream of more, not seeing the point when she knew she'd never see it]
no subject
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[She rolls her shoulders a bit, making herself relax] Anywhere in particular?
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It used to really freak me out when I was new.
no subject
But I like it now. It makes me feel so...small, or like I could just fall into the stars and swim around them or something. I like going up there now, I wouldn't mind meeting you there.
-> action
Okay. See you there.
[And then she clicks off.
She doesn't, technically, recognize Sae. But she does recognize the look of someone she doesn't recognize who's looking for someone she, in turn, also doesn't recognize - and so when she thinks she spots her, she takes a chance and approaches.]
It makes you feel small in a good way.
[She says, completing the unfinished thought.]
Not like you're getting ground down or brushed off, but like-- like you and your problems aren't everything that's out there, and like you're a part of something big.
no subject
She eyes Tiffany curiously; Sae herself is dressed in her normal white kimono with its red obi, and there's a red, rope-like marking around her throat. But Tiffany's response makes her smile a little again]
Mm. It feels like there's so much more out there, waiting to be seen... [She looks back out at the stars] I've never been this close before. It's hard to believe sometimes.
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Does it feel like it's stuff you wanna see?
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It'd be nice. But I don't want to do it alone anyhow... So it's better to stay put. I like hearing others' stories just as much.
no subject
[Understatement of the century. Tiffany pauses for a long moment, eyes on Sae.]
What's your sister like?
no subject
Yae is great! She's kind and wise, she's confident and good at making decisions. She's definitely the leader and the strong one. [She smiles a bit, though her expression is wistful]
We're identical, but I think our personalities are really different... She's more outgoing and friendly. I was always the shy one...
no subject
[Tiffany says, a preemptive apology.]
It always feels like y'all want me to leave you alone, and I think it's real important to not be pushy and to respect people's wishes, so--
[So she often ends up disengaging, and sometimes it turns out that that's not what they want or need at all.]
Is this the first time you've been without Yae? Like, are y'all together at home a lot?
[Sae, she thinks, looks young - possibly young enough to still be living under her parents' roof. And as far as first homes away from homes go, she can't think of any place more jarring than the Barge. Talk about being thrown into the deep end of the pool.]
no subject
[She considers a moment before continuing] Where I’m from, girls don’t leave the home until they’re married. And in my village… in my village, twins are considered sacred.
No one talks to us. They’re too pious, or… too afraid. So it was always just me and Yae.
Our mother… Even our mother couldn’t stand that she’d had twins. As soon as she realized, she killed herself. So it was just us and our father. He was the head of the village and the ceremony master, so we had a lot to live up to. Or… Yae did. No one had any expectations for me. I was the younger twin, so all that was expected of me was to die for the village.
You don’t waste too many resources on a cow you raise to slaughter. [There’s no emotion behind this— just a statement of fact.]
no subject
[An understatement of a reaction, but it's the first thing that slips out of her mouth.]
You come here right from there, or did you get out first?
no subject
No… my sister and I tried to escape, but… it didn’t work. Or rather, we fell and got separated. The village found me and they never found Yae.
They sacrificed me by myself. But they did it wrong; I came back. And I wiped the village off the map, and everyone in it.
[Her fingers curl into her kimono and she takes a deep breath, slowly uncurling them again.] The place was cursed and I was in the dark for a long time. Then someone came and broke the curse. And I came here.
no subject
I'm sorry about what they did to you. And I'm sorry-- I'm sorry you lost Yae.
[She lets out a shaky breath.]
Has anybody ever told you that you didn't deserve all the shit they put you through?
no subject
She rubs her arms a little and looks at Tiffany quietly, as if trying to decide what to say.]
I don't know. I mean... I'm glad that people care. It's... different, and a little strange. But it's nice. I don't think I deserved to go like that either, even if...I knew I would have to, some time.
I didn't mind doing the ritual. I wanted to help my village, but... Not like that. [She sighs deeply and looks away at the stars again] I don't know. I've never known anything different, so being here has been...odd.
no subject
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People are...very nice here. And... They really seem to care about me and like me. At least, the ones I have met have been. Sometimes, I wish I could show the people of the village how much I could be liked.
no subject
I wish I could do that, too.
audio
audio
I've been better.
[Her voice sounds strained, croak-y, and she coughs wetly.]
My throat hurts. [pause.] A lot. [Understatement of the year]
What about you?
audio
[To the extent that she's a little surprised, actually. She'd figured herself as more fucked up than this would seem to imply.]
Can you write?
audio -- > text
Yes. My sister taught me.
[She switches to text]
I don't like this, whatever's going on.
text
do you want tea and medicine
no subject
I like tea though. The tea here is different from home, but it's nice.
no subject
[Tiffany isn't much of a tea-drinker herself, but so many people here are that she's gotten used to having it on hand, and she likes the ritual of it.]
magic medicine would work the best i think but you don't have to do that if you don't want to
no subject
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but i know people who do
and some of them work in the infirmary and are really good at using it to help heal people
Voice
Trevor Belmont. I think we got paired up..damn, a while ago. Sorry - flood knocked me out.
Text during the Gradumotion Flood
Know we don't talk, but Ulla needs your help. You're the only one the Admiral will accept it from, so touch base with her if you can.
text - > audio
[and then she switches to audio. She sounds...alright, if a bit wispy and she's interrupted occasionally by giggles that seem to bubble up]
I will reach out. [She sounds like she's struggling to keep her own composure though]
Things have gone... [She trails off, as if she doesn't know how to best describe it, but then it stretches on as if Sae's simply forgotten she's speaking in the first place]
Re: text - > audio
[He pauses long enough to wet his lip.]
Means the Wardens ended up like how we are normal, an' so they just lost a lotta shit that's important to 'em. Those that got proper pairs just...kinda just swap places. But Ulla ain't got one, so she's fucked in that department. He said ya could speak on her behalf though. Hence me touchin' base.
no subject
But if I can help...I want to help. I'll help. What do I say?
no subject