It was really scary when I first got here. [She smile a little though]
But I like it now. It makes me feel so...small, or like I could just fall into the stars and swim around them or something. I like going up there now, I wouldn't mind meeting you there.
[There's a smile in Tiffany's voice, and she opens her mouth to say something - but decides, in the end, to save it for when they're face to face.]
Okay. See you there.
[And then she clicks off.
She doesn't, technically, recognize Sae. But she does recognize the look of someone she doesn't recognize who's looking for someone she, in turn, also doesn't recognize - and so when she thinks she spots her, she takes a chance and approaches.]
It makes you feel small in a good way.
[She says, completing the unfinished thought.]
Not like you're getting ground down or brushed off, but like-- like you and your problems aren't everything that's out there, and like you're a part of something big.
[She'd been waiting only a little bit before Tiffany arrived, her eyes fixed on the stars up above. When Tiffany speaks and continues the conversation they'd just been having, it startles her, though it allows her to easily identify her.
She eyes Tiffany curiously; Sae herself is dressed in her normal white kimono with its red obi, and there's a red, rope-like marking around her throat. But Tiffany's response makes her smile a little again]
Mm. It feels like there's so much more out there, waiting to be seen... [She looks back out at the stars] I've never been this close before. It's hard to believe sometimes.
[And Tiffany, in jeans and a t-shirt, is definitely underdressed in comparison. It doesn't seem to bother her, though: she joins Sae easily, leaning her elbows on the railing.]
[Sae eyes her curiously then, as if trying to decide how much she might really understand. But she seems to accept it enough, perking up some when she has the chance to talk about her sister,/small>]
Yae is great! She's kind and wise, she's confident and good at making decisions. She's definitely the leader and the strong one. [She smiles a bit, though her expression is wistful]
We're identical, but I think our personalities are really different... She's more outgoing and friendly. I was always the shy one...
It always feels like y'all want me to leave you alone, and I think it's real important to not be pushy and to respect people's wishes, so--
[So she often ends up disengaging, and sometimes it turns out that that's not what they want or need at all.]
Is this the first time you've been without Yae? Like, are y'all together at home a lot?
[Sae, she thinks, looks young - possibly young enough to still be living under her parents' roof. And as far as first homes away from homes go, she can't think of any place more jarring than the Barge. Talk about being thrown into the deep end of the pool.]
Oh… [She frowns a little, brow furrowed, and shakes her head] No, I don’t want that. I just… Don’t know how to talk to people much.
[She considers a moment before continuing] Where I’m from, girls don’t leave the home until they’re married. And in my village… in my village, twins are considered sacred.
No one talks to us. They’re too pious, or… too afraid. So it was always just me and Yae.
Our mother… Even our mother couldn’t stand that she’d had twins. As soon as she realized, she killed herself. So it was just us and our father. He was the head of the village and the ceremony master, so we had a lot to live up to. Or… Yae did. No one had any expectations for me. I was the younger twin, so all that was expected of me was to die for the village.
You don’t waste too many resources on a cow you raise to slaughter. [There’s no emotion behind this— just a statement of fact.]
[Sae shakes her head, sighing softly. Her expression is wistful]
No… my sister and I tried to escape, but… it didn’t work. Or rather, we fell and got separated. The village found me and they never found Yae.
They sacrificed me by myself. But they did it wrong; I came back. And I wiped the village off the map, and everyone in it.
[Her fingers curl into her kimono and she takes a deep breath, slowly uncurling them again.] The place was cursed and I was in the dark for a long time. Then someone came and broke the curse. And I came here.
[Tiffany doesn't want to be repetitive by saying it out loud again, but she repeats it in her head: Jeeeeeeeeeesus. Her fingers clench on the railing, but - overkill or not, heinousness of killing those in the village who were innocents or not - her anger isn't directed at Sae.]
I'm sorry about what they did to you. And I'm sorry-- I'm sorry you lost Yae.
[She lets out a shaky breath.]
Has anybody ever told you that you didn't deserve all the shit they put you through?
[It's not often she hears people express that-- maybe two or three times now, and every time she doesn't know what to do or say in response. She supposes they're right, even if Sae twists it in her own head. She didn't deserve to die like that. It should've been Yae killing her. That would've been the only proper way.
She rubs her arms a little and looks at Tiffany quietly, as if trying to decide what to say.]
I don't know. I mean... I'm glad that people care. It's... different, and a little strange. But it's nice. I don't think I deserved to go like that either, even if...I knew I would have to, some time.
I didn't mind doing the ritual. I wanted to help my village, but... Not like that. [She sighs deeply and looks away at the stars again] I don't know. I've never known anything different, so being here has been...odd.
I felt the same way when I got here. Kind of. I ain't gonna pretend I was raised to be killed in a ritual, but... I weren't used to being valued, is what I mean.
People are...very nice here. And... They really seem to care about me and like me. At least, the ones I have met have been. Sometimes, I wish I could show the people of the village how much I could be liked.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
shinkunochou) wrote2022-07-26 06:37 pm
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[She rolls her shoulders a bit, making herself relax] Anywhere in particular?
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It used to really freak me out when I was new.
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But I like it now. It makes me feel so...small, or like I could just fall into the stars and swim around them or something. I like going up there now, I wouldn't mind meeting you there.
-> action
Okay. See you there.
[And then she clicks off.
She doesn't, technically, recognize Sae. But she does recognize the look of someone she doesn't recognize who's looking for someone she, in turn, also doesn't recognize - and so when she thinks she spots her, she takes a chance and approaches.]
It makes you feel small in a good way.
[She says, completing the unfinished thought.]
Not like you're getting ground down or brushed off, but like-- like you and your problems aren't everything that's out there, and like you're a part of something big.
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She eyes Tiffany curiously; Sae herself is dressed in her normal white kimono with its red obi, and there's a red, rope-like marking around her throat. But Tiffany's response makes her smile a little again]
Mm. It feels like there's so much more out there, waiting to be seen... [She looks back out at the stars] I've never been this close before. It's hard to believe sometimes.
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Does it feel like it's stuff you wanna see?
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It'd be nice. But I don't want to do it alone anyhow... So it's better to stay put. I like hearing others' stories just as much.
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[Understatement of the century. Tiffany pauses for a long moment, eyes on Sae.]
What's your sister like?
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Yae is great! She's kind and wise, she's confident and good at making decisions. She's definitely the leader and the strong one. [She smiles a bit, though her expression is wistful]
We're identical, but I think our personalities are really different... She's more outgoing and friendly. I was always the shy one...
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[Tiffany says, a preemptive apology.]
It always feels like y'all want me to leave you alone, and I think it's real important to not be pushy and to respect people's wishes, so--
[So she often ends up disengaging, and sometimes it turns out that that's not what they want or need at all.]
Is this the first time you've been without Yae? Like, are y'all together at home a lot?
[Sae, she thinks, looks young - possibly young enough to still be living under her parents' roof. And as far as first homes away from homes go, she can't think of any place more jarring than the Barge. Talk about being thrown into the deep end of the pool.]
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[She considers a moment before continuing] Where I’m from, girls don’t leave the home until they’re married. And in my village… in my village, twins are considered sacred.
No one talks to us. They’re too pious, or… too afraid. So it was always just me and Yae.
Our mother… Even our mother couldn’t stand that she’d had twins. As soon as she realized, she killed herself. So it was just us and our father. He was the head of the village and the ceremony master, so we had a lot to live up to. Or… Yae did. No one had any expectations for me. I was the younger twin, so all that was expected of me was to die for the village.
You don’t waste too many resources on a cow you raise to slaughter. [There’s no emotion behind this— just a statement of fact.]
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[An understatement of a reaction, but it's the first thing that slips out of her mouth.]
You come here right from there, or did you get out first?
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No… my sister and I tried to escape, but… it didn’t work. Or rather, we fell and got separated. The village found me and they never found Yae.
They sacrificed me by myself. But they did it wrong; I came back. And I wiped the village off the map, and everyone in it.
[Her fingers curl into her kimono and she takes a deep breath, slowly uncurling them again.] The place was cursed and I was in the dark for a long time. Then someone came and broke the curse. And I came here.
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I'm sorry about what they did to you. And I'm sorry-- I'm sorry you lost Yae.
[She lets out a shaky breath.]
Has anybody ever told you that you didn't deserve all the shit they put you through?
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She rubs her arms a little and looks at Tiffany quietly, as if trying to decide what to say.]
I don't know. I mean... I'm glad that people care. It's... different, and a little strange. But it's nice. I don't think I deserved to go like that either, even if...I knew I would have to, some time.
I didn't mind doing the ritual. I wanted to help my village, but... Not like that. [She sighs deeply and looks away at the stars again] I don't know. I've never known anything different, so being here has been...odd.
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People are...very nice here. And... They really seem to care about me and like me. At least, the ones I have met have been. Sometimes, I wish I could show the people of the village how much I could be liked.
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I wish I could do that, too.